Girls 101 #it’s hard out here for a b*tch… By Moshibudi Thatego Madia

30 Aug


Everyone knows the saying :”walk a mile in my shoes”, well I say not just any shoes, but 8 inch high stilettos owned by a bad b*tch. The world, and by that I mean men, can never really understand what it is to be a woman until they hear our stories. So this piece isn’t about how ‘things’ can be done, or a ‘we are crying out’ article, it is just about walking a day, because anything more than that men would crawl into a fetal position and weep endlessly, in our shoes, boobs and all. I’m going to cover 5 key things, we, ladies have to deal with daily. Get ready.

  • Courtship.

As ladies, historically speaking, women, in terms of courtship were the prey and men, the predator. Those principles were passed on to us today. The gist of it though today is we have become empowered to switch the roles up just a bit. We don’t keep our heads down and wait for a man to pick us from the row of virgins, we flirt now, and flirt hard. The downside is, men have sadly not caught up with the flirt game, I mean no matter how many times I flick my hair, laugh, or touch his shoulder, all he’s thinking is “and my ninjas didn’t think I’m funny, I’m slaying”, no boo, I’m flirting, hint hint! let’s get together. But there is a very fine line between flirting and trying to get rid of you. When I laugh at your jokes but am walking away at the same time, or my body is positioned in such a way that I have my back to you, then I’m trying to get rid of you, but once my body language changes and I touch you, ANYWHERE while talking, laughing and not walking away, then that means that I have you in my sights, and I’m coming in for the kill.

  • Intercourse.

Ever wondered why ladies ‘catch feelings’ after having sex? Even a one night stand? Well, it’s not because we are weak, for your information, but because our bodies are programmed that way. During intercourse, women release a love hormone called oxytocin, were aside from catching feelings, it helps us to enjoy the ‘tango’. Oxytocin is also released when a mother breastfeeds her child, this is what leads to the phenomenal bond between mother and child.

  • Menstruation.

Fellas, before you close your eyes, shut your ears and start yelling “lalala”, understand that you would’ve proven my point exactly, you can’t hang with us! On a serious note though, menstruation is a celebration of womanhood, because it signals health and fertility, and every period should be acknowledged as such, even though it may feel like a serrated sword is driven in and out your body for days on end, and you get super snippy, it should be celebrated, oh and guys, identify the signs and stay out of the line of fire.

  • Sexual harassment.

There is a fine, and I mean very fine a line between paying a lady a compliment and just being inappropriate. Over the years there has been an increase in sexual harassment complaints at University institutions, by female students, about male lecturers most of whom get away with the harassment, and continue to torment other vulnerable students. Personally, I have experienced such in the past two years, and on my quest for justice and to shame him, the opposite was the result. He still lectures me today. I’ve been exchanging experiences with other girls who’ve fallen victim of men riding the chariot of power over their dignity, and they have expressed how deep the trauma has cut them. Imagine the conflict within yourself, you need your lecturer to give you advice and clear your confusion, but you are scared of him, and even more so to be left alone with him. Many ladies say that they find themselves failing the course despite putting in the work, and when they approach their lecturer, he uses that as ammunition to get them to do the things they don’t want to do to change their situation. It’s really disgusting and the fight for justice is not for the faint hearted.

  • Booty ogling.

If guys aren’t checking out our décolletage, then they are checking out our booty! I know music videos have made it seem cool to stare at our booty while we are looking right at you, and even have the audacity to make a cheap comment about it, the truth is, we don’t really like that. We may smile and flack you off, but the things we are holding ourselves back from saying are foul. Don’t get me mistaken, we don’t hate you checking us out, we check guys out all the time, but do we stare, licking our lips and twirling our hair? No, but in our minds, it’s going down. Pop culture as made the booty a centerpiece of celebration, we don’t mind, just stop with the ogling already! We know what we’re working with.


These make up only 0.001% of the things women deal with on a daily basis, but we are not complaining, just indirectly humble bragging, juggling so many balls in the air and managing to stay fabulous at the same time. You cannot compete with us.


Article By Moshibudi Thatego Madia


Posted by on August 30, 2015 in Feminism


Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

3 responses to “Girls 101 #it’s hard out here for a b*tch… By Moshibudi Thatego Madia

  1. Ashley-Anna

    August 30, 2015 at 20:21

    AMEN! This article is so so so so so good! I wish every man on the planet was forced to read this.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Lehlogonolo Mmapea

    November 20, 2015 at 19:26

    This is really Good even amazing to be written by somebody you know personally Great work *Thatego and as a man i take all the guilt and a Seed 🌱 has been planted

    Liked by 1 person

  3. moody

    November 21, 2015 at 12:18

    Amazing talent! This is good!!
    Well done Shibu! :*

    Liked by 1 person


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